True Friends Are Treasures!

One of the most treasured things in life is having a true friend. I have always tried to teach my children that it is far better to have one or 2 true friends than a bunch of acquaintances. It is far better to be truly known and understood by a few than it is to have a bunch of people who know who you are, but do not really know you.

So, what is a true friend then? I believe a true friend knows who you are, the good, the bad and the ugly, and accepts you as you are. A good friend challenges you to see yourself through his or her loving eyes, so that you are not always so hard on yourself. A good friend supports you through the hard times, rejoices with you when you are happy and gives you in return what you give and, sometimes, he or she gives even more to you than that. For me though, one of the most essential qualities of a true friend is someone who will always tell you the truth, no matter how difficult it may be. He or she “speaks the truth in love”, as scripture says (Ephesians 4:15).

I am blessed with a few friends whom I know are true. Now it is confession time. I can be very opinionated at times. I can even be judgmental, which is not something that makes me proud of myself, believe me. I do not hate anyone or feel that I am superior to anyone in any way, but when I am passionate about something or I feel there is an injustice occurring, everyone around me will know what I am thinking or feeling and it is not always pretty. Sometimes I fail to practice what I preach and I do not realize that I have grown complacent in my continuing endeavor to be all who God wants me to be.

I was going through this very thing when my wonderful friend and soul sister, Linda, spoke the truth to me in love about my struggles with being judgmental and she shared her concern about it with me. I will be honest; it was not easy to hear. I was in no way angry with her. What I felt was a deep conviction. I even felt ashamed, but, because she knows me so well and she knows my heart, she was also able to help me understand her words came from a place of pure love, concern and a desire for me to be all that I can be in God. I did not feel that she was angry with me or that she thought I was a bad person. Knowing this and believing in her sincerity as a child of God, I was able to receive her message with the intention in which it was given. She had the love and courage to speak these difficult words to me, but because of that, I can now take another step towards becoming the woman in the Lord I am supposed to be. For that, I love Linda and I will forever be grateful to God that He put her in my life.

I am not saying that every person in your life who is blunt and critical of you is a true friend. If a person’s spirit comes from a place of insecurity and he or she is quick to point out everyone else’s flaws without working on his or her own, then that person’s sincerity is very questionable. However, if you know you have a person in your life that loves you with an unconditional love and speaks the truth to you out of concern, then you are truly blessed. In Proverbs 27: 5-6 it says, “Better open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend are received as well-meant, but an enemy’s kisses are insincere.” In other words, it is far better to have a true friend who will say something you need to hear out of pure concern for your well-being than it is to have a marginal friend who only says what you want to hear. The latter shows a lack of concern for your personal growth. With friends like that, who needs enemies?

I would like to end with some words of encouragement. For those of you who have maybe only a couple of people in your life, but you know those people are true friends, consider yourself blessed. I have worked with and met so many people who, on the surface, seem like they are popular and have the love and admiration of many, but, underneath the surface, they feel so lonely. They feel as if no one really knows who they truly are inside because no one has really taken the time to get to know them. They have been hurt by people in their lives whom they thought were true, but just turned out to be jealous fools who ended up disappointing them somehow. I may not be popular and known by many, but I know I am loved for who I am by the true people in my life. I am never lonely, because I know my true friends are only a phone call away. I hope I make them feel the same. You are not defective or worthless if you have only a couple of true friends; you are blessed beyond measure! God bless.